How to drive fast on drugs while getting your wing-wang squeezed and not spill your drink

"When it comes to taking chances, some people like to play poker or shoot dice; other people prefer to parachute jump, go rhino hunting, or climb ice floes, while still others engage in crime or marriage. But I like to get drunk and drive like a fool. Name me, if you can, a better feeling than the one you get when you're half a bottle of Chivas in the bag with a gram of coke up your nose, and a teen-age lovely pulling off her tube top in the next seat over while you're going a hundred miles an hour down a suburban sidestreet. You'd have to watch the entire Mexican air force crash-land in a liquid petroleum gas storage facility to match this kind of thrill. If you ever have much more fun than that, you'll die of pure sensory overload, I'm here to tell you."

Salon.com Life | Is CRACK wack?

"An organization that pays drug-addicted women to get sterilized is increasingly getting referrals from publicly funded agencies. Its supporters say it's saving babies from being born into hellish lives. Its critics say it's practicing 'Hitleresque eugenics.'"

Console Modder goes to Jail under DMCA

Dammit! And I've been thinking about modding my XBox. Guess I won't be using the Enigmah chip.

"A man found guilty of selling mod chips on his website in breach of the draconian Digital Millenium Copyright Act has been sentenced to five months imprisonment and a $28,500 fine.

David Rocci, who sold the Enigmah mod chips for the Xbox from his site, Isonews.com (we reported on the site being seized by the US Department of Justice last month), pleaded guilty to breaching the DMCA by selling illegal copyright circumvention devices last December."